So What's Your Story?
I'm standing next to the lemonade cooler (I know, the location lends itself to catastrophe). I start talking with a young woman who I had spoken briefly with that afternoon.
"So what's your story?" she asks.
Brilliant question, I think to myself. It cuts through so much... something I might have said if I didn't think it would have offended my interlocutor. What it really means:
"Hi. I'm interested in finding out more about you, but I'm really not interested in going through the regular game of 20 questions. So, here's your chance to encapsulate you in one or two sentences, which will allow us to get to interesting conversation more quickly."
Brilliant... except it isn't really. Not if you're not ready for a break from the norm (And she didn't impress me as one who was). If we were in a more intimate one-on-one setting (maybe a coffee shop or at dinner), I could have really gotten imaginative with my response, but the surroundings suggested I refrain from anything too avant-garde.
Instead, the question got me thinking immediately (probably to my detriment, I'm sure)--not about some witty thing to respond to her--but why the hell I was talking to her in the first place. It reminded me what this all seemed to be, and brought it into violent relief.
It reminded me how much it felt like a personal prositution.
"So what's your story?" (in this setting) = "Come on you! There's 50 other people in this room and you better interest me or I'm moving on! Tell your life's story in an intriguing soundbite or get out of my way!"
And yet that's what we always do. We give each other so little room to manoeuvre in our social dealings. We want gratifying conversation with total strangers. And we make immediate impressions about people based on spurious slices of imperfect information.
So I laughed, spat in her drink and walked away to talk with someone who was prettier, was better proportioned and had thinner legs. Actually I didn't. I talked with her and her friends for the next 10 minutes. But you can imagine what it would be like.
"So what's your story?" she asks.
Brilliant question, I think to myself. It cuts through so much... something I might have said if I didn't think it would have offended my interlocutor. What it really means:
"Hi. I'm interested in finding out more about you, but I'm really not interested in going through the regular game of 20 questions. So, here's your chance to encapsulate you in one or two sentences, which will allow us to get to interesting conversation more quickly."
Brilliant... except it isn't really. Not if you're not ready for a break from the norm (And she didn't impress me as one who was). If we were in a more intimate one-on-one setting (maybe a coffee shop or at dinner), I could have really gotten imaginative with my response, but the surroundings suggested I refrain from anything too avant-garde.
Instead, the question got me thinking immediately (probably to my detriment, I'm sure)--not about some witty thing to respond to her--but why the hell I was talking to her in the first place. It reminded me what this all seemed to be, and brought it into violent relief.
It reminded me how much it felt like a personal prositution.
"So what's your story?" (in this setting) = "Come on you! There's 50 other people in this room and you better interest me or I'm moving on! Tell your life's story in an intriguing soundbite or get out of my way!"
And yet that's what we always do. We give each other so little room to manoeuvre in our social dealings. We want gratifying conversation with total strangers. And we make immediate impressions about people based on spurious slices of imperfect information.
So I laughed, spat in her drink and walked away to talk with someone who was prettier, was better proportioned and had thinner legs. Actually I didn't. I talked with her and her friends for the next 10 minutes. But you can imagine what it would be like.
3 Comments:
I think her question was great. With it, she attempted to break through the cover of your book without the blah blah blah. Is shows an interest in you in a shortage of time. She was taking advantage of the moment, considering the regular game of 20 questions takes up a considerable amount of time. Kind of cool, if ya ask me.
By
Shinerd, at 10:35 AM
I think you each have an interesting perspective, and I took it at first. She was being original and different and was willing to take a chance, etc.
But the more I thought about, I think she was just being lazy and selfish. "So what's your story?" in this case was more "Get to the chase and entertain me" more than "tell me something intriguing so I can know you better." But maybe you're right. In any case, I should probably work on my "story" to make sure it's interesting when the next person asks me ;)
By
Ecthelion, at 4:28 PM
Girl: So what's your story?
You: What do you mean?
Girl: Your story. Is it an action/adventure? Is your life full of daring chances, moments of triumph and tears as you fight through life? Or is it philosopical? Is your story like reading something from Aristotle or Plato? Where you think your way through stuff and become elightened? How about Sci-Fi/Fantasy? Do you D&D your way through things? Roll the die and make your move? Or a romance novel? I personally like those.
All this from a girl that works in a freakin bookstore.
By
Dottie!, at 10:59 PM
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